Do you see your life as gamble which you need to win?

In UK, a heavily pregnant MP was allegedly told not to “play the pregnancy card” after leaving a House of Commons debate to grab a snack.

Chandler in a FRIENDS episode tells Ross: I think you “played the Gunther card” too soon.

In a Mom’s episode. Christy says that Marjorie “plays the cancer card” too much.

Every time I hear the reference of “play the card”, an image of a well-planned, conceited approach to a situation comes in front of me. Is this how we are supposed to react to situations and people? As if we see our life as a gamble and we need to plan our moves as if every step of our life was a chess/cards game and every single action of ours could either take us ahead or back in life?

Can/should we live with this constant calculation of what card to play to suit which reaction?

In my struggle to find answers to these questions, I go to the field of sports. I believe sports teaches us a lot of character building and adversity management and it has always inspired me.

Sportsmen practice as per their strengths and also as per the opponents. They change their game plans to come one up and beat that particular opponent. Which means they play “A’ particular card for “A” particular player, a “B” card for another player and so on.

Why?

Because they want to win.

If we bring that analogy to our daily lives, then does that mean that we can “win”, if we carefully choose our cards?

Yes.

Just hold on that Yes and take a moment to understand what I have said till now. Here’s what I mean. If you want to win every time you talk to your boss, your spouse, your kids; look at your bank statement, see your health reports and clean that rusting guitar; then you can. You can win every minute of your life, if you choose your cards well.

Our need to win, to excel and to outshine our own capabilities is never ending. It’s a human trait. Some have it more than others. Some want it all, some don’t. But we have all been in situations where we have wanted to win in our financial health, physical wellbeing, relationships, career or even hobbies.

And if you want to win, then you need to know when to play which card. We all carry these cards with us all the time. The one who wins is the one who knows which card to use when. And winning or desire to win is not bad. We should all try and win. Wouldn’t it be lovely to see all the 3 Olympics medals are being given to Indians? Because they all wanted to win? Similarly, wouldn’t it be lovely, that all members of your family are happy and smiling because they are all winning something every day?

Here’s what I mean by choosing your cards to win every single thing:

I am stressed out today and I feel like getting some advice from friends. I will play the whining card.

I didn’t get the promotion I deserved; I am upset about that; I anyways didn’t want to go to my in-laws house for dinner-  I will play the victim card today.

I need to get that promotion. Who else is in contention. Amit? He comes across as a serious guy, I crack too many jokes. Let me now talk only serious stuff. Playing the ideal candidate card.

I don’t feel like making dinner, I will use the having-a-headache card today!

I need that order. Let me play the sympathy card today

He doesn’t listen to me, let me play the angry mom card today

It’s all around us, all these cards are flying. If you aren’t using them consciously, someone else is. Which means, you may not win.

If you don’t want to win, then obviously this doesn’t bother you. But if you do, then start seeing actions as cards people are using and how you can ace that up with a better card.

So which card are you playing today?