Birthday is a very special day, for some. For others it’s just any other day and as Mr. Amitabh Bachchan recently said, a birthday is a reminder that you have gone one year closer to the ultimate reality we all fear!
I love the excitement that birthdays carry, specially other’s birthdays. Every year I spend time planning a nice birthday treat for them and making it special. And they do the same for me. It’s convenient, we don’t have to think much and just flow with the plan made for us. But this year, things seem different. Bored of the same thinking pattern every year, I asked myself- If I were to celebrate my birthday the way I want, and not how someone plans it for me, how would that be? Would I like to plan a holiday? Throw a party? Spend the whole day at a spa?
How do you decide what should you do on the most special day of your life? Should it be celebrated with family, with friends, or with no one? Some people have a defined routine for their birthdays- they go on their annual international trip around that time, or visit a NGO, or have a quiet family dinner; some prefer being alone. Basically, some people are clear with what they want to do, most that I know just cut a cake. And to this last lot, I asked this- What is it that you want to do? What would make you really happy? And there was silence. This wasn’t a question they had asked themselves, let alone been asked in a long time. Seeking answers from within is always difficult and not something we have been conditioned to do.
The more I think about the non-clarity in our minds about how to celebrate our most special day, the more worried I get. We aren’t talking to our own self enough. We don’t know our likings or dis-likings enough. We are conditioned more to adapt than to appreciate our own unique beautiful self. If a simple question like- what is it that we’d like to do- like really want to do, gives us trouble, then how can we even begin the process of finding our larger calling?
I wish I could go back to the school final year and re-fill all the slam books with answers that define me, and not the answers that I was supposed to write. What’s your favourite food, your favourite colour, your actor or actress? What’s your hobby? Your most memorable moment? What makes you happy? What makes you sad? Who is your idol and why? Who do you want to be when you grow up? Whom do you like spending time with?
All pertinent questions were unfortunately just ignored under childish banter.
During my office days, when I read and analysed psychometric reports of employees with them, there used to be moments of excitement, gasps of-oh yes this is me, the bewilderment of- really, is that me? Some agreed and used those reports for their self-development initiatives and some just filed it away. One thing was always common- the anxiety to know what’s my personality. Imagine, getting to know who you really after 30 years of being you?
They say our subconscious mind is 300 times more powerful than our conscious mind and here we are, not even knowing what are conscious mind needs, forget about reaching the sub conscious level!
Do yourself a favor and spend some time answering the slam book questions today. If nothing else, it will help you plan your next year’s birthday ?
Very well written. Leaves a lot to think …
Thank u sachit
Hmmm. Nice thoughts.