When she lost hope of finding her missing bottle

It was her favourite bottle,had to be because it had Cindrella’s carriage printed on it, with her name styled as if she was the princess who rode it to the castle. She would take it everywhere-school, playground, dance class, it was like a crown she owned.

The fateful afternoon, when she lost her beloved bottle, she didn’t know the reaction she felt. She got down from the school bus, and with a worried look told me, “mummy I can’t find my bottle,  I don’t know where I dropped it.” She didn’t seem upset or sad about losing it. She felt scared, because her mommy could give her a big lecture and scolding, after all it was an expensive buy.

Feeling the heat of the sun piercing us through the umbrella, I didn’t care about the bottle that time, I just wanted to rush to the airconditioned home. And so I said, “it’s okay, we’ll find it tomorrow.”

She couldn’t hold back her relief and asked instantly, “aren’t you mad at me for losing it?”

I wasn’t, not at that time. She had lost things in school before but being the possessive holder of her belongings,  she had always managed to find them the next day and hence I kind of had a feeling that it’s just a matter of 24 hours before she drinks from her favourite bottle.

But it wasn’t to be. Next day, she got down from the bus, with tears in her eyes. “Mumma, I couldn’t find the bottle. I looked for it everywhere. I asked ma’am also but she said find it on your own. I want my bottle back.”

Once the fear of getting reprimanded for losing an expensive thing had settled in her heart, could she really emote out her true feelings. She felt lost, dejected and surprised. Lost because how would people recognise a princess without her crown? Dejected since she really liked it and surprised because she had always found her things back, how could her superpowers fail her when she needed them the most?

After a lot of cajoling and a promise that I would help her find it in the lost and found section the next time I go to school, I managed to somewhat uplift her somber mood. All I did was give her Hope.

Hope, a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen. Right in front of my eyes, I was witnessing the power of having and not having one! The first day she had a hope of finding it and hence didn’t bother much, except for the scolding. The next day, she lost all her hope and fear of losing her biggest asset gave out her real reactions of losing something so precious. The hope’s not all completely gone, because she wants the otherwise super mom to use her magic wand one more time and gift her back what belongs to her.

As a mother, I know of two possible outcomes to this situation-

1. We will find it

2. She would forget about it in a few days and shift her loyalties to another loved possession.

As a coach, I know of a third possibility- the person will hold on to it and not want to come out of the grief of the loss or the shock of losing one of his superpowers- that he would damage a lot more of himself.

And that’s concerning.

What happens to us when we become bogged down by stress, responsibilities, worries and relationships, that we keep losing hope? Despite knowing everything – time heals, tomorrow is another day, we are made of better things, why do we still let the hope to slip away and become victims of our own expectations and beliefs?

Imagine waking up to a day without any hope. You don’t hope to have a traffic free ride, you don’t hope to settle the pending payments, you don’t hope to impress your boss with your presentation, you don’t hope to get a hike, you don’t hope for a good day for your kids, you don’t hope for your spouse’s mood to be good, you don’t hope to own the upcoming new car of your favorite brand.  It’s omnipresent, every day of our life is filled with a lot of hope, a lot of desires, our innate wishes. You can never completely devoid yourself of it, if you lose one hope, there’s another staring right back at you! The question is do you hold on to the other hope or do you invest in the hope that’s now gone?

Hope brings positivity and there’s no better healer than a positive attitude. So, with the hope that you too would either find your missing bottle or graciously choose to adjust to its replacement, here’s to a happy everyday!