It’s a normal practice in my office to eat lunch together. The whole team would occupy the longest table available and open up their lunchboxes announcing the items of the day loudly for everyone to know. I get reminded of ladies kitty parties whenever I chance upon being on that table. Those 30 mins are full of leg pulling, shout-outs and extreme laughter.
One such afternoon, things took a different turn. For some reason, a debate started between non-veg eaters and veg eaters. Something that started off as a harmless comment, got snowballed into an ethnic/religious/caste thing, which took everyone by surprise. As was expected, many started coming in to pacify the two agitated talkers. Things got cooled down, but the sentiments didn’t.
The national intolerance debate in the background, I looked at those scenes and could easily see two distinct upbringings that are not individually wrong in any way. They just don’t seem to agree to each other, that’s it. But does that mean they are not respectful of each other’s views?
A regular temple goer sits and eats lunch with a non-believer of God.
A family man works along with someone who doesn’t believe in family values
Someone who doesn’t believe women should work, works under a female boss
A veg eater has a best friend in a non veg eater
Such contrasts of life are omnipresent. And we live them every single day. You and I are living examples of being adjusting and tolerant to things we don’t believe in, but are imbibing them as routine. And yes, as humans, there are moments when we don’t mind voicing our opinions, when we don’t mind arguing with a colleague and reasoning our ideology with him, sometimes at the loudest decibel possible. And that is it. That is the tall and short of it.
Basis that lunch table incident, should I brand those two colleagues as “intolerant”?
What and where is the thin line between what is acceptable to be heard and hence tolerable v/s what shouldn’t have been said? Who decides that?
The answer is not as difficult as it may seem. It’s all within us.
When people ask and eloquently debate on prime time, “Is India an Intolerant country?”, don’t marvel the skills of the speakers, but answer that question yourself, “Are you an intolerant Indian?” To help you answer that question, don’t look too far behind.
Did you send WhatsApp messages to your group either in support of or against what Aamir Khan said? Could any of your innocuous message been construed in a manner that could incite divide in your friends, who are also your countrymen? Were you a tolerant Indian who chose not to react to the situation?
“They” is a beautiful word which we all use freely. But the fact of the matter is, it’s always just You and Me.
Shabash Dua.
Very well thought out and written